Honestly, I swear I have so many interesting stories to relate (and pictures… and even a video!) that are NOT wedding related (and whether that’s “interesting” or not is up for debate) but somehow this wedding stuff is preying on my mind and in between making plans, stressing over plans, obsessing over plans and my crazy days at work, I haven’t been able to post them yet.

But I will, I promise! So you non-wedding-lovers, hang in there.

For now though, can I please tell you about my second-ever wedding nightmare? I need to get it out of my mind where it’s whirling around, wrecking havoc.

As you’ll recall, my first wedding nightmare saw me on a random deserted island in the tropics, anguishing over my missing dress. This week, however, the dress stress took place during my waking hours (thanks to Karo, Patti & Mama K for talking me down from the bridge yesterday… no not literally, I’m kidding… but I’m staying away from BCBG for awhile) so my unconscious hours in what should have been la-la land were free to be filled with disasters of another nature.

This time, all was sparkly happiness and unicorns and rainbows as me and all my favorite people in the world explored this amazingly beautiful resort on some amazingly beautiful island. There was a moment of trepidation as we wondered how we’d find a table to fit us all for dinner but it magically sorted itself out as rays of joy emanated from everyone’s heads and doves flew overhead. Ok not really. But it was a nice, happy dream.

And THEN…

As I was looking out the window admiring the multicolored hot-air balloons which were floating in the sky (this being my happy place, of course there’d be hot-air balloons… Which makes me wonder, do they have those in the Caribbean? How COOL would that be?!? Anyways, back to the story…), I sensed some people stirring behind me and turned around to be met by a portrait of complete panic and mayhem. As he rushed around, one of the resort’s employees paused long enough to tell me that there was a hurricane outside and “for God’s sake, we’re not hosting any weddings here this week?! In fact, we’re trying to cancel the weddings that are already booked here for this week, don’t even think about trying to have yours here this week.”

And then I woke up and stared up at the dark ceiling and obsessed for a couple hours about how we can’t seem to get any of the wedding coordinators to return our emails and phone calls and oh my gosh if they don’t get back to us soon how are we going to book anything and what if they don’t and all the flights and hotel rooms get booked up by other people and what if they do get back to us and tell us that there are no wedding dates available that week sorry you’ll have to change your plans and then we have to start all over from the very beginning waaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!

I don’t think it’s that I’m afraid a hurricane will touch down. It’s just that I feel like a hurricane. Whirling and spinning and a ball of energy but not accomplishing anything.

That’s because now that we have certain decisions made, we’re waiting for confirmations from other people. And it’s killing me to wait.

I hate waiting. In fact, I’d go so far as to say I loathe waiting. I detest it, I abhor it, I curse waiting. Waiting is the bane of my existence. I crave hyper efficiency, I want quick turnaround, I need answers to my questions before I’ve even finished asking them.

What is my problem??! I need to chill out. Things will sort themselves out. You know, the Power of Now and all.

Well, what with all the waiting, I’ve had some time to think about it.

And I’ve realized that this high speed lifestyle of instant gratification and 24/7-connectivity has made me terribly, terribly IMPATIENT.

I guess the first step in overcoming it is recognizing it.

Maybe the second is to stop watching the hurricane reports on the evening news?

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